Love is an overused word. Love is about bringing out the best in each other. Love is a choice. In this article, you will discover the power of love through the Enneagram.
When we choose to love another person, we respect them whether or not we are happy with them. What does love mean for you?
Discovering your Enneagram type can help you to love yourself, your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife.
What is the Enneagram? It is a psychological-spiritual map to help you be your best.
Do you expect your partner to read your mind? Even if they could read your mind, would you want them to read your thoughts?
Thank goodness, your partner can not read your mind. It is up to you to let them know what you want.
You first will need to discern what you need in your relationship; then find the best way to communicate your desires.
An excellent way to learn what you desire in your relationship is to do some journaling and meditation. If your partner is open, you could experiment with ideas you both have to see if these are activities you desire to do as a couple in the future.
Most of what a good relationship comes from both your willingness to bring out the best in each other.
Here are five ways to help express your desires (and get) what you want in your relationship: Continue reading
No divorce is easy! Even in the best circumstances, when you can both agree to the terms of the divorce it is still stressful.
Right after your divorce, you will need all the support you can receive. Friends and family might be enough. But if you are having a hard time moving ahead you would benefit from psychological help. There is no shame in getting help because this demonstrates your courage.
No matter how you feel, take your time to work through the pain of ending your relationship. It is time to focus on your own needs.
Here are four signs that you are ready to move on after your divorce: Continue reading
Relationships are complex. If you want a good relationship, you and your partner need to be committed to making it work.
Being committed means, you need to take responsibility for keeping your own emotional, physical and spiritual health. You need to be one hundred percent responsible for your happiness.
You need a partner who is willing to be responsible for his issues. He needs to be ready to keep himself healthy and stay committed to building a healthy and robust relationship with you.
There is nothing magical about getting married. Getting married will enhance healthy relationships and make destructive relationships even worse.
There is no such thing as getting married and happily living ever after without intention and effort.
When you both walk your talk; you are likely going to have a harmonies relationship. It takes time, patience, self-awareness and playfulness. You can make it happen. Continue reading
A good relationship consists of many qualities. But for you to recognize these qualities you need to be open and healthy yourself. Continue reading
God comes to you in many ways. God has many names Father, Allah, Mother, Oneness, Divine One and more.
God desires you and your partner to be your best as individuals and as a couple.
A good relationship with God will improve your marriage because the Spirit will help you to find your holy wisdom right within you. Continue reading
The Enneagram is a psychological-spiritual tool that can help you to become more balanced in your three energy centers, head (thoughts), heart (emotions) and body (sensations). It is a map for personal growth.
This map will help you to notice when you are getting healthier or staying stuck in the limitations of your ego. The Enneagram not only reveals your level of health, but it also gives you clues to help you become more balanced.
What makes a good relationship according to your Enneagram type? It depends on the emotional, mental and physical health of you and your partner. It requires you both to be as healthy as you can be in your Enneagram type. Continue reading
Today pets have become members of our families. You love them. You make sure your animals are well treated. They give you pleasure.
Your relationship with your dog or cat is much simpler than with another human being. They love you unconditionally. You never fear being rejected.
Do you love to sleep with your dog or cat? Sleeping with your pet can be comforting. The sound of their breathing relaxes you. The feel of a living creature cuddling up to you feels good.
The challenge is when you get so enmeshed with your pet it becomes difficult for you to welcome the affection of another human being. The relationship with another person is much more complicated. While it can be more challenging, in the end, it is more rewarding.
The challenge is to find the right balance in the power we give our pets in our lives, especially in the bed.
In a recent survey given by Mattress Advisor, they asked a thousand people about their relationships with their pets in their beds. For example, they found that if you allow your pet to sleep in your bed when you don’t want them to you are more likely going to be hurt in a relationship.
If your pet is given an occasional free pass, you are more likely to have healthier relationships, and if it does end, it will end on a more mutual basis.
If you let your pets sleep in bed with your approval, then you are more likely to end the relationship yourself.
You can not compare a relationship between a pet and another person. They are just different.
Too often pets become an excuse not to take the risk of connecting with another human being.
To often pets can be used as a tool to hurt your human partner; this is never the pets fault. It is always the people’s fault.
My own story is that my first wife had a beautiful cat. She loved him deeply, and he was part of her life long before she met me. When I met her, I had some allergies to cats, but it wasn’t too bad. Over the years she insisted that the cat sleeps between our heads on our bed. Over time it got to the point that I struggled to breathe.
It became clear that I was less important than the cat. When the cat died, I insisted that we don’t get a new cat. My wife at the time would not listen to me. Before long, our relationship ended.
My wife and I allowed the cat to control our lives making it difficult to bond as a couple.
If you are in a relationship with a person who is allergic to your animal, you will need to consider finding a new home for your pet or ending the relationship.
The humans need always needs to take priority over the animals. The caveat being that the pet still requires proper care.
It takes self-awareness to become conscious of how you are using the animals in your life. Are you using them to meet your emotional needs? Do you have a pet to keep you company? Do you have a pet to avoid needing a human companionship?
If you are having a hard time meeting your significant other; you might want to look at your relationships with your pet. How are you allowing your pet to get in the way of bonding with another human being?
A great tool to help you get in touch with what is going on inside you is the Enneagram. For more information on the Enneagram: Click Here.
The Enneagram points out to you where you get stuck when you are under stress. Each of us is given one of nine different ways to survive in the world. During your childhood and youth, your type kept you safe. When you become an adult, it will hold you back when you are not aware of how your personality is restricting your choices in life.
The Enneagram will show you how your type impacts how you use animals as a crutch when you are stressed out. For example:
Type One: (Reformer) The pet for a type one will soothe their need to be accepted when they are so tough on themselves.
Type Two: (Helper) The pet for the type two will meet their need to know they are loved and special.
Type Three: (Achiever) The pet for the type three will be a symbol of their success. They won’t have a mutt.
Type Four: (Individualist) The pet for the type four will be a living creature for them to bond with at a deep level. It will be the one living creature who truly understands and respects their individuality.
Type Five: (Investigator)The pet for the type five will allow them to have companionship without the need to talk.
Type Six: (Loyalist) The pet for the type six will be a friend who will comfort them during their fear and anxiety.
Type Seven: (Enthusiast)The pet for the type seven will be a friend they can share all their adventures.
Type Eight: (Challenger) The pet for the type eight will be a friend that will provide a safe space for them to show their vulnerable side.
Type Nine: (Peacemaker) The pet for the type nine will be the essential creature that will help them to know they have a place in the world.
Your pet can enrich your life. Animals bring us many gifts including unconditional love, companionship, invitations to play, something to care for and an exuberance for life. Animals have a special place in our lives.
The trouble is when you use your animals as a place to hide from building healthy, loving and transformative relationships with another human being.
Building a relationship with another human being is riskier, but then the benefits of a close human relationship cannot compare to one with an animal.
The research from Mattress Advisor gives us helpful information that can help you to build a good relationship. If you want more information on how to find the best mattress for you check out this page: Click Here
The learnings you take from the Enneagram can help you to be more self-aware so that you can have healthy relationships with both people and animals.
Roland Legge can help you to find balance in your life with your furry and human friends. For more information, please arrange for a free 30-minute discovery call by emailing Roland at rolandlegge@relconultants.com or book your appointment
Article republished with permission of the author. This was originally published on REL Consultants
Roland Legge 